The boat is fine, now its down to me

Honesty is the best policy, so a summary of the last couple of events (IOM ranking,13 and 8 and DFTT 2nd and 1st) reads like this. Anxiety and fear still hamper racing IOM's but a reset for the TT finally addressed the issue and the natural talent started to come through.

The ranking event was disappointing. I have a block with racing the IOM at the moment. The boat is balanced and quick but I am just doing stupid things with my sailing tactics. It has been the story for the last two years experimenting with different boats and setups, but I have learnt so much on this journey which would never have happened, had I stuck with a standard production boat. The catch though, is I seem to have created a confidence issue which impairs my judgement and stops me seeing shifts, gretting the right postioning and subtleties on the race course.

So the Monday after the ranking event I took a long hard look at what is going on in my head.

Our behaviour is basically made up from our thoughts. E.g. Imagine you are happy and you will be. Imagine you are sad and you will be in that state. It is the same with sailing. If you have fears and anxieties in the background, that will affect your judgement. Senses are dulled and your mental proceses distracted. If your mind is clear and you just focus on the race course, boat and setup, you will do well as your natural talents can flow and your senses be alert. Mine mind was a bit of a mess of confused thoughts.

My symptoms were nerves, shaking, feeling warm/hot and sometimes when things go wrong the head feels like exploding. That destroys the sense of awarness and ability to get round the racecourse successfully.

So I looked for help from an author called Napoleon Hill, as I have successfully used his principles in the past. After a colourful life of failed businesses, a few marriages, accusations of unethical behaviour, he wrote a book called "Think and grow rich". He was obviously good, because the internet is lettered with stories about him both good and bad. There are different opinions on some of the truths in the book but it has become a goto personal development book and sold millions of copies worldwide. I have read it and applied his principles in business to great effect. If you listen to the modern day podcast on improving your life, a lot of what is said can be found in "Think and Grow rich".

There are also various talks on Youtube which are AI generated versions of his texts which I found very interesting and useful to fill time on journeys to events. One in particular got my attention.

So before I get into that I reviewed at my thoughts on the start line. Remember this only applies to a ranking event, national championship or international event. It seems the top competitors get into my head

I wrote down what could possibly be holding me back. Why am I so tense and what am I afraid of.

The list:

Doing badly

Getting it wrong

Fear of losing

Fear of going the wrong way

Not qualifying for the worlds

Embarrasing myself

I always pick up weed or a jelly fish

People think I am not realising my potential

I am just not lucky with the wind

The top 10 sailors have decades of experience and most are past champions

So how did I get the control back. In the youtube talk, reference was made to developing a sense of presence in everything you do. The phone was a big distraction so I put it away and only refer to news, social media email at certain times of the day. I practiced presence with the family applying 100% focus on conversations. When I did stuff around the house and garden I made sure I had total engagement. These were little things to practice a sense of presence which I would apply on the start line and the race course at the DFTT the following weekend.

That starts to address the engagement, next I had to uncover and address the old fears and anxieties. By writing them down, I could address them one by one.

Doing badly - what does it matter. I now imagine I have come last in the next race so I have already failed so I can forget about that thought.

Getting it wrong - Again it did not matter. If I got something wrong I would make up for it later in the race.

Fear of losing - I remember playing golf. After a round nobody cared about your score, only the fun and cameraderie during the round. Once a race is done, the result does not matter. Again before the race I imagine I finished last to get that thought out of the way.

Fear of going the wrong way - If you do not take risks on the race course you will never win. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Fear of going the wrong way leads to sheep like behaviour and that will never help.

Not Qualifying for the worlds - It does not matter. If I do not get into the Datchet event there will be others.

I always get weed. I cannot help that. Weed is a bit like the lottery. When it is your turn you are going to get some. The trick is how you handle it and move on to recover.

I am just not lucky with the wind. This is a thought that comes into my head when I am just not focussed correctly on wind shifts. I now tell myself I am relaxed and a bit of a wind whisperer.

The top 10 sailors have decades of experience and most are past champions. They are just human beings like me. I have special talents, have past success and beaten most in the past at some point. They are beatable.

So all the above are just thoughts created by me and they are so destructive but they can easily be cast away.

Having got that out of the way, I felt a lot better and much more relaxed when I thought about past starts in national and international competition. In summary I haven't a care in the world and any negative thoughts that come into my head are just thoughts so I can discard them.

Next I had to consider what I should be thinking about on a start line.

2 minutes to go

Am I standing in the right place

I have a good view of my boat in a crowded start

I am at one with the boat

I am looking upwind for the first shift and have observed any obvious signals around the course, eg, flags, smoke, windsocks

I fell the boat is fast and as best prepared as can be

I have a sense of the best side of the beat to be on and positioning the boat for that on the start.

1 minute to go

I am relaxed and present. Any negative thoughts coming into my head I treat just as thoughts and discard them.

I have positioned the boat to be at my chosen end of the start line.

I feel the ground beneath my feet.

My fingers are relaxed and gently moving the control sticks

I am breathing deeply

The start

I feel the boat is fast and sail bow down for speed

I sense the first shift and that the boat is ready to tack

My senses are alert to any new quirks in the wind and I have the freedom to respond.

When I was an up and coming competitor in International Cadets, I initially thought you had to think you were a winner. It was only when I realised you needed to pay attention to all the details that mattered towards winning rather than thinking about winning itself, that I emerged quickly as a champion. Unfortunately I never addressed my nerves that came constantly winning at events. I put so much pressure on myself but succeeded all the same. Whilst it did not seem to matter in dinghies and yachts, it appears that nerves and anxieties can be quite destructive in radio sailing.

I think I have made a breakthrough in managing my thoughts and had the opportunity to test my theory at the DFTT at Fleetwood. Imagine my surprise when I was totally relaxed on the start line with 33 DF65s. My senses where alert to the quirks that Fleetwood throws at you. I had some extraordinary beats where the boat seemed to be powered by an outboard. Amazing what happens when you have the freedom to let your talents come out.

So what have I learnt through this exercise.

The power of writing things down.

We are never to old to learn or even relearn.

The mind can be reprogrammed.

Our thoughts are like software to power the subconscious mind.

I will be able to test my mental processes further at the Marblehead nationals this weekend.

On another note, I am putting my new VISS together. It might not be the prettiest thing, but boy is it well designed, beautifully engineered and a joy to assemble.

How fast on UK waters. Who knows? A top production boat with an enhanced skipper. What could possibly go wrong